Corona Diaries: Since days

Image © Gaby Bila-Günther aka Lady Gaby 2020

by Gaby Bila-Günther aka Lady Gaby March 26, 2020

I havent put on make up
i havent dressed up
i havent worn lipstick to kiss anybody
i havent touched my face with unscrubbed hands
i havent worried about preparing
i havent worried about getting there on time
i havent stopped cooking
havent stopped washing my hands
havent stopped disinfecting my life and everyone in it
havent stopped making calls
havent stoped worrying
havent filled out emergency, relief forms
havent shaken hands, hugged or spoken to strangers
havent met any strangers
havent validated a ticket
havent been in crowds
havent partied hard
havent drank corona beer, or corona infected beer
havent looked at my bank account
havent argued, havent screamed, havent felt hate, havent broken down
havent thought about hopes
havent thought about the future, havent felt the future, havent felt secure
havent streamed myself or my wishes
havent sneezed, havent had fever
havent shopped like a hamster
havent stocked up on toilet paper
havent found any soap
havent left my house
havent left my mind
havent left any worries
havent been alone
havent thought about sex
havent had sex
kept them at physical and emotional distance

since days
i have written
i have laughed
i have entertained myself
i listen to good music
i have been online
i learn new words and practise old words: social distance, staythefuckhome, isolation, lockdown, virus, dont be selfish, no contact, cancelled, apocalypse, zombies, quarantine
i make art
i communicate
i take instagram more seriously
i thank and like facebook a bit more
i have opinions, i write them down
i surf the internet, join streaming groups, sign petitions, hope to float above water
i hate pushing and touching buttons
i worry about my bankcard catching corona inside those machines
i see life as a sci fi movie and i am scared
i rush out of supermarkets
i need toilet paper too
i have feelings
i cry, i have tears when i hear balcony music and see dancing on deserted streets
i have bonded with distant family
i have worried about my older parents
i have played with my cat, she is my new muse
dug out weeds in the garden
i was pricked by roses
i trimmed trees and branches
i enjoyed the sun, the spring, the sun, the spring, the sunshine days
i rehearsed somebody elses words round a piano
i was happy
i am creative
i am at peace
i feel loved
i got high
i got my period
i drink wine
i had my birthday and i cancelled it
i hate social distance but dont walk too close to me,
i keep one and half meters away between you and i
i have touched my mouth with überclean hands
i am worried about money
i have no work, no shows
i am worried about rent, bills and catching up
i have turned the balcony into my new stage
i have new hobbies, cleaning my house is not one of them
i want to say fuck you corona in many more languages but i take you seriously
i have said hello to myself in the mirror cos time is on my side
i have so much time on my hands to worry but also to live


Gaby Bila-Günther, aka Lady Gaby is a Berlin-based spoken word & performance AND visual artist who was labelled ‘the Peaches of spoken word’ in Berlin, ‘oddly poetic’ and ‘flamboyant and upbeat’ by The Age paper in Melbourne , “story teller extraordinaire by The Melbourne Times, ‘A true artist ahead of Berlin’ by journalist Nadja Sayej and ‘provocative’ by The Pill in Prague; blushing she asks – why?

A regular performance artist and writer on Berlin’s scene, labelled one of Berlin’s 10 best poets to look out for in 2016, Lady Gaby hosts multimedia performance events as well as interviews, international and local performance & music ‘scene shakers’.

Lady Gaby is the ‘hostess with the mostess’, performance and visual artist, writer, event organiser in Berlin, the city where she found her feet, her words and works and made up her mind about the world around her.

Lady Gaby runs the monthly spoken word and live music event, The POETIC GROOVE IN BERLIN, and here are some links to my work:

instagram: gabybilagunther

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